On power dynamics.
Power dynamics are part of nature. How might we harness Her?
Power dynamics exist all the time.
This isn’t a bad thing… or a sign of inequality… or a sign of inequity… or a sign of injustice.
This is NATURE.
The structure of attention is what decides how the power dynamic goes.
when your attention is IN, you're focused on your own experience (sub)
when your attention is OUT, you're focused on the other person’s experience (dom)
it feels 🤮 when one or both of you isn’t able to CLEANLY INHABIT these roles
look at a battery:
++ doesn't work
-- doesn't work
+- does
but nothing was “wrong” before; the dynamic was just set up to fail
see also: m/f polarity & integration
(m = not synonymous with men; f = not synonymous with women)
the best* conversations & interactions are DYNAMIC & involve some degree of turn-taking between these roles
the more effortless & RECIPROCAL, the better
(*it's more fun when it's easy)
ARE YOU ABUSING YOUR POWER?
The easiest way of abusing your power is to deny that it exists.
The second-easiest way is to hate and/or be ashamed of it.
Both are examples of what happens when power is shamed & shame is weaponised.
Because weaponising shame is the real threat to individual & collective harmony.
Not power.
Not shame.
Not sex.
Not religion.
And certainly not ‘differences of opinion’.
When we weaponise shame, we create a culture in which nothing & no one can be safe.
... THAT’S dangerous.
the number one thing that's standing in our individual & collective way/s is not being able to speak openly, clearly & directly about sex & power.